Tag: goals

One of the students in my Emotional Intelligence class told our group about her childhood. She had tough experiences growing up, and continues to deal with challenging family issues. She talked about feeling overwhelmed at times.

Her situation was unique, but I can relate to it. Don’t we all have something challenging in our pasts that we had to work to overcome? Don’t we all face situations from time to time that drag us down?

It’s what she told us next that stuck with me. She talked about volunteering with groups that help disadvantaged women and said she does it even when she feels sad. She contributes and gives support to others, even when she is grieving her own losses.

She felt sad and did it anyway.

A few days ago I read an article by Scott Dinsmore about fear. He talked about being paralyzed by doubt when he sat down to develop a new course. He talked about nearly cancelling a workshop that he had already advertised because when he tried to create the materials, he choked.

Then he wrote something really interesting. He said that when he completed those programs, he was proud of the way they turned out, and that he considers them the most significant work he’s ever done. Wow.

He was afraid and did it anyway.

This week I gave a short presentation to a local Rotary group, on the topic of preparing to quit a job. It was a great experience – the Rotarians were gracious and I enjoyed the chance to connect with them. Plus, it was fun to speak about what I’d learned from all those hours of research. But leading up to the event… I was tired!

I had some of the Scott Dinsmore-styled fear, and am still grieving the loss of my beloved cat. But what really threw me off balance were two weeks of personal mayhem. Unexpected events consumed much of the hours and energy that I planned to use on preparing for the talk. Instead, I was on edge and sleep deprived, but I chose to work through the fatigue to narrow my topic, review my slides with friends and rehearse.

I was tired and did it anyway.

It doesn’t mean that we should keep pushing ourselves nonstop. Now that my presentation is done, I’m resting more, drinking immune-system-building tea and scaling back on social events while I regain my energy.

I’m a big believer in giving ourselves breaks. I think we should overcome the pressure to operate like robots, and stop congratulating ourselves when we ignore the need to rest and recover. But there’s a difference between relentlessly pushing ourselves past healthy limits and taking on specific challenges that require extra effort. Sometimes a goal or activity is worth the exertion required to get past obstacles like sadness, fear and tiredness.

The next time I have a big opportunity in front of me, one that is worth going after, I’m going to acknowledge how I feel about it. I’m going to think of ways to maintain my health while I pursue my goal. And then I’m going to —

do it anyway.