Tag: stress
Getting work done in difficult times
Even during less stressful times, I sometimes have trouble concentrating on my work. I can spend too much time worrying about everything on my to-do list, or lose focus when I’m interrupted, and then at the end of the day I’m disappointed with my output.
Then at the beginning of March 2020, my day-to-day anxiety spiked with the news headlines and worries about family and friends, and my work productivity took another hit. I knew I needed to break away from habits that were getting in the way of my work and replace them with simple, sustainable actions that help me succeed.
Different things will work for different people, but I have my best days when I do these two things:
- Commit to focusing on one thing at a time.
- Plan for something enjoyable when the workday is over.
Commit to focusing on one thing at a time
It isn’t enough for me to vaguely know that this is a good idea. When I wake up in the morning, I set an intention to focus on the task at hand, whether it is a work or personal project. I remind myself not to multi-task and to bring my attention back to what’s right in front of me if my mind starts to wander.
We’ve all heard about how mindfulness and being present helps us stay centered and mentally healthy. But it is equally true that splitting attention between multiple tasks and thinking about things besides what is in the present is harmful to wellbeing.
I didn’t take this seriously until I had a string of terrible workdays. I had a hard time concentrating and felt scattered because my attention kept jumping from the file I was updating, to the pings I got on messenger, to the meeting reminders, to the phone calls, on and on and on. By the end of the day I hadn’t made enough progress on anything to feel a sense of accomplishment. Instead I felt drained and frustrated.
It can be tempting to just do “one little thing” while on a boring conference call, and we can tell ourselves these little tasks like typing an email, or updating a file are productive, but any gains in time saved are cancelled out by the hit it takes to our brain power. If I’m really having a hard time staying focused in a virtual meeting, I take notes about what is being discussed.
Plan for something enjoyable when the workday is over
This could be anything that sounds nice; it doesn’t have to be anything grand. This is helpful because it gives you something to look forward to all day. It makes any tedious work feel temporary.
A recent fun thing to look forward to after work was having happy hour on my balcony. It was the warmest, sunniest day we’ve had all year and I was excited to have a little more time in the fresh air. I had planned to wrap up my work by 4:30 PM and go outside, even though I knew that my client would probably contact me about an urgent issue.
Sure enough, when I was halfway through a glass of chardonnay, my phone buzzed with a request to talk. It was no big deal. We chatted for all of 3 minutes, and I spent another 20 minutes on my laptop, while sitting on my living room floor with my feet on the balcony next to my glass of wine. Then I got back to enjoying my evening. If I hadn’t planned for my happy hour, I probably would have sat at my desk waiting in case my client needed me and I would have missed out on great way to wind down my day.
Another day’s plan was less ambitious: I decided that after I finished work and dinner, I would play a game on my phone for as long as I wanted before bed. Today’s plan is to bake chocolate chip cookies.
If it seems counterintuitive to be more productive at work by planning to have fun afterwards, consider how you feel when you’re looking forward to a big event, like an exciting vacation. It is a mood booster, and being in a good mood is great for productivity.
It also makes the not-so-fun parts of the workday more tolerable when you know that they will end, and you will soon be doing something that makes you happy.
Making it a habit
There are other things that also help me with energy and focus, like getting outside for a daily walk, eating nutritious food and limiting the amount of time I spend reading the news or social media. But I just do these things, without needing to be quite so intentional about it.
It takes time to build habits. Until it becomes an automatic part of my lifestyle to stay in the moment instead of multi-tasking, and to give myself something to look forward to every day, I need to remind myself to do these things. Sticky notes on my desk, a daily calendar reminder – whatever it takes.
These are stressful, uncertain times, which isn’t ideal for productivity. And yet for the last few weeks I’ve ended each day satisfied with what I’ve accomplished. And now I’ve got to complete my to-do list, which I’m excited about. Because when I’m done…there will be freshly baked cookies. Can’t wait!
Recovering from emotional fatigue
When we’re physically exhausted, a good night’s sleep is often enough to bounce back. Emotional fatigue can take a lot longer to recover from.
When we’re drained of energy by things like the shock of bad news, being overwhelmed by too much on our plates, or from slogging through a rough day at work, we often don’t feel better the next morning.
It took me many years to learn what helps me recover from this type of exhaustion. My best remedy is spending an entire day or more in a quiet, dark room. I’ll read a book or just rest. The important part is the sensory deprivation, which is my antidote for too much stimulation.
Of course, it’s often not possible to shut myself away from everyone and everything for 24 hours because even on a weekend there are people or things that need attention. When I can’t take a long break, I ask myself, “what is the most supportive thing I can do for myself right now?”
During a rough day last week, the answer was to take a 30-minute walk in the last bit of afternoon sunshine after I finished work. A month earlier, it was to take two hours to be alone in the middle of a weekend spent with others. Even though neither of these were my perfect solution, I felt significantly better in the moment and was back to my normal self within a couple of days. I found a way of starting to regain energy instead of continuing to add to my stress and exhaustion.
Part of why this method works is that I acknowledge how depleted I am and then assign the intention of supporting myself to whatever action I decide take. If last week I had just hung out on the couch, scrolling through my phone mindlessly for two hours, I would have distracted myself but not taken steps toward refilling my tank.
If you’re feeling drained, what is the best thing you can do for yourself right now?
The Life Sucks But Actually Everything Is Going To Be OK Playlist
When times are really good or really tough a custom playlist gets inside those feelings to work them out. Here is what I’ve been listening to non-stop for the last week, and why.
- “This Summer (Explicit)” by Maroon 5. This is a perfect song to start off with because it feels bad-ass to sing the f-word with feeling when things aren’t going the way you want. This especially works if you’re the kind of person who tries not to swear. “This summer’s gonna hurt like a…”
- “Uprising” by Muse. This song reminds me that I’m in charge of my life and my personal power is mine and mine alone. “Rise up and take the power back.” “We will be victorious.”
- “Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons. I feel like the old me has died and the new me is on the verge of rebirth. “I’m waking up, I feel it in my bones/Enough to make my systems blow/Welcome to the new age.”
- “It’s Time” by Imagine Dragons. There is power in new beginnings. It’s not always easy and sometimes it takes a long time, but the process is not going to change my truest self. “It’s time to begin, isn’t it?” and “The path to heaven runs through miles of clouded hell right to the top/Don’t look back.”
- “Come with Me Now” by Kongos. This is a power song. Sing it and feel the solidarity with others who are also going through a tough time. “Walk on with me now.”
- “Scars” by Papa Roach. Yep, this describes how I’ve felt many times. “I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut/ And my weakness is that I care too much/ And our scars remind us that the past is real.” I’m compassionate and empathetic. And, if a situation is dragging me down then I’ve got to let it go to honor myself and my own path. So “GO. FIX. YOURSELF.” “I can’t help you fix yourself…I gotta move on with my own life.”
- “Bad Blood” by Taylor Swift. I love Taylor Swift. I feel like my life is a medley of Taylor Swift songs. This one is empowering, putting it out there, like “hey, I’m not ok with what happened there, and I’m done with this.” I love the whole song, but especially, “It’s so sad to think about the good times” because it didn’t used to be this way. And, “if you’re coming my way — just don’t.”
- “Roar” by Katy Perry. It is a little awkward following Taylor Swift’s “Bad Blood” with Katy Perry, because of, you know, their “bad blood” or whatever. But after getting all fired up by my girl Tay, I’ve got to Roar. So “get ready cuz I’ve had enough…dancing through the fire…I am a champion, and you’re gonna hear me roar.”
- “Some Nights (Explicit)” by Fun. I am very clear about what I stand for. Yet this is just how it is sometimes: “Some nights I stay up cashing in my bad luck/Some nights I call it a draw”. And, “Man you wouldn’t believe, the most amazing things that can come from/some terrible nights.” Amen.
- “Carry On” by Fun. Here is a happy tune that makes me want to keep my chin up. “If you’re lost and alone/Or you’re sinking like a stone/carry on/May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground/and carry on.”
- “Tonight, Tonight” by Hot Chelle Rae. This song makes me laugh and reminds me that even though my struggles are real and “oh well, whatever” doesn’t make them go away, I can still go out, see friends, have fun, and remember that I’m alive. “It’s my party, dance if I want to.” This is a great song for blowing off steam.
- “Pompeii” by Bastille. “How am I gonna be an optimist about this?” ‘nough said.
- “Renegades” by X Ambassadors. This is a beautiful melody, calming and strong at the same time. Sometimes the truth isn’t popular and justice seems elusive, making us feel like we’re “living like we’re renegades.” However, I have faith in being true to my values. “Go forth and have no fear/Come close the end is near” is real for me because I cannot wait to get through this rough time. I’m thankful to draw on my own convictions and the support from people who care about me.
- “Girls Chase Boys” by Ingrid Michaelson. Even though this song sounds like it is about romance, these words fit many situations: “All the broken hearts in the world still beat/Let’s not make it harder than it has to be.” And, “I’m a little let down but I’m not dead/there’s a little bit more that has to be said.”
- “Don’t Come Around Here No More” by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. This is another song that could apply to any issue. “Don’t come around here no more/whatever you’re looking for/Hey! Don’t come around here no more.”
- “Fighter” by Christina Aguilera. It would be a waste not to learn or gain something from difficult times. I’m looking for the positive and am grateful for what is good in my life. This is also one of my power songs that helps me tap into my inner strength. “Makes me that much stronger/Makes me work a little bit harder/Makes me that much wiser/So thanks for making me a fighter.”
- “I Don’t Wanna Be” by Gavin DeGraw. To end this playlist, I want to remind myself that “I don’t wanna be anything other than what I’ve been trying to be lately/all I have to do is think of me and my peace of mind/I’m tired of looking ‘round rooms wondering what I gotta do/or who I’m supposed to be, I don’t want be anything other than me.”
If my playlist doesn’t do it for you, make your own angst-ridden list! I’m thinking of all of you out there dealing with tough times. Solidarity.
Stress is Not Mandatory
After receiving my 10 year service award…so exhausted!
For most of my career I thought stress was unavoidable and therefore something I needed to simply accept. You know how it is in an office – the deadlines, the pressure, the politics – it’s always something.
It could be diminished by a relaxing vacation and it could be forgotten about when I was immersed in a good book, but stress was always present in one form or another.
Then I quit my job and realized I didn’t have to just accept it. After all, I quit that whole pile of job stress and walked away!
Of course as I changed my career I encountered new kinds of stress (I previously blogged about the difference in pressure being an entrepreneur vs. an employee). But this stress is much easier to deal with. Once I unplugged from the corporate machine, life slowed way down. Now instead of a constant flow of adrenaline, there are ebbs and flows. There is also a lot more space to deal with the tension, both in my days and in my brain.
Stress is not mandatory.
Employee Stress vs. Entrepreneur Stress
I had stress when I worked a full-time corporate job. I have stress now. What’s the difference?
Corporate stress came from unrealistic workloads, office politics and being asked to participate in business decisions that I disagreed with. Working in a stressful environment is like breathing in low levels of poisonous air every day. It won’t kill you all at once. It is a long, slow decline.
Entrepreneur stress is completely different. It is the flip side of the positives parts of working on my own. It comes from the pressure I put on myself to spend more time on my projects. It’s learning Quickbooks and all kinds of marketing and operational tasks that I used to have corporate resources to help me execute. It’s the uncertainty of not having a scripted career path.
This kind of stress is much easier to live with. I can decide how many hours to spend on my business and writing projects. I can outsource tasks that aren’t my strong points and that I don’t enjoy doing. I can tame my thoughts when I worry.
All stress is not created equal.
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